This too shall pass. Success is not permanent. Failure is momentary too.
In exam cycle of 6 years, I gave 5 attempts and 4 interviews. I got my name in the final list on 3 occasions including in the recent CSE-17 list.
If you notice my credentials, it says changed to IRS(IT) from IPS(P). I have received many questions on same.
I first cleared exam with CSE-14 and got 222 rank and IPS.
The detailed application form (DAF) for CSE-15 was filled somewhere in sept-oct 2015. I gave CSM-15 and joined national police academy for IPS training.
In 2 weeks itself I had a grade 1 ligament tear in right knee and then in left knee. I continued training till March 2016 and took extraordinary leave (EOL) because of injury.
Result of CSE 15 came in May 2016 and i got rank 207 and IPS again. Remember the ligament injury!
Had I known that I would get injured, I would not have opted IPS again in DAF.
I decided to give another attempt. Result of prelims came in Sept 2016 and my time was perhaps not right as I flunked prelims 2016 by some 2 marks. This was a rude shock to say the least.
I was still injured and had to take another EOL. Ligaments take their own time to heal. But IPS training has to be done within 3 attempts. What if I am injured next year as well? I will end up with no service!
So i gave Technical Resignation from 68rr and joined 69rr and took EOL.
CSE 2017: Jan 2017 itself I started prelims preparation and solved 43 papers, along with customary static and current portions. This is how a candidate giving his/her 1st attempt would go about it. On 18th June I was sure of clearing prelims.
Mains esp GS has been my forte. Not to brag but I have managed more marks in GS than the toppers in CSE-14 & 15. (11th highest in Mains 2014 & 5th in GS 2015. Optional geography and personality test are my weak areas to say the least).
But I was doing GS after gap of 2 years and there was a lot of self doubt. I practiced harder than before and gave my best.
Meanwhile, i was taking care of my injury. Gym, physio, medicines, ayurved, top doctors and what not. But come winters, the problem aggravated again. Finally after wasting huge sum of money on MRIs, Nuclear bone scans, Consultations etc a general physician diagnosed Osteoarthritis (OA) within 3–4 secs. OA wears down Cartilage.
All this resulted in yet another EOL.
December 2017 I decided to join quora, make my youtube channel and wordpress blog to help aspirants if I am not able to help myself. It has given me immense love and joy.
Finally, CSE 17 results came. I got selected with rank 173.
This rank will get me IRS(IT). This rank saves my career. This rank would end more than 2 years of leave from service.
{EDIT based on a comment below: Had I not got a rank, I would have needed 2 surgeries and 5 months rehab before mandatory training at NPA the coming year.}
Still, it is rank 173 and not rank 1. My friends, ones who know me well and me myself feel I have been hard done by 222–207–173.
Yes I have something but not what I wanted when i started this journey on 8th June 2012.
How I feel?
Well, I have accepted IRS(IT) as my career. I am not giving the lone attempt left as I feel that I have had enough of it all.
Today I have mix feelings but I hope few years down the line I would be happy.
Motivation lies within you. There is no need to wander beyond.
All my notes and strategies are available for aspirants at
DecodeCIVILS and
Mudit_jain
Source Qoura
